Modesty Monday–a review and some sites

Welcome to the second week of Modesty Monday! Today, I’ll review “Girls Gone Mild” by Wendy Shalit, and also link to some modest clothing sites. Got any to add? Put it in the comments!

I enjoyed “Girls Gone Mild” but, I’ll warn you, it was pretty graphic. I read a lot and I’m not usually taken aback by what I read, but some of this was very graphic. I would not recommend it for teenagers to read, but I think it might be worth the shock value for parents to read, especially those that don’t think there’s a problem with modesty today.

That may have been Shalit’s intention with this book, as it was more intense than her earlier book “A Return to Modesty.” It was interesting to read how the public responded to her first book, both good and bad. To me, this book was an easier read than her first book. It was hard to put it down.

Here is a list of some clothing sites that carry modest, but not frumpy clothes. I didn’t have time to make these links look pretty. Sorry.

Published in: on April 13, 2008 at 8:31 pm  Leave a Comment  

Dresses? Not at church!

I am tired of being the only woman at church on Sunday in a dress. Lately, it seems every other female at church is wearing pants. Now I’m not dresses only, but I do think a dress or skirt is more feminine. It’s more ladylike. So why am I the only one wearing one?

I’m not saying it’s sinful to wear pants to church, but it’s not dressy. It’s not as feminine. God designed us to be male and female. What better place to show those differences? I wonder if it’s not pants so much that are the issue, but the lack of “dressing up” at church now. I realize that there are people who are wearing the best they can. If jeans and a t-shirt are the best you can, wear it and don’t be ashamed. But those are not the people I’m talking to. Why are we treating church as some other thing we do, like going to the mall or the grocery store? Shouldn’t we dress up a little to show some respect? It’s not like going to the mall or the grocery store. It’s a place of worship. I think it’s great to be comfortable at church, but we should never forget we’re in the house of God. Do we want God to see us dressed in ratty shorts and a t-shirt in His house, when we know we could do better? Yes, God looks at the inside, but man looks at the outside. Man sees us dressed inappropriately and thinks Christianity is no different that any other religion.

I know some will say casual dress at church makes seekers feel more welcome and not worry about standing out. I understand that. But if you’re a Christian, you are called to be different from the world, not to make the world feel better about themselves. I don’t think we should make anyone feel bad about not being dressed properly. But if we’re Christians, we ourselves do need to dress properly. I’m tired of seeing women who have nice, expensive clothes in their closets wearing ratty jeans and a t-shirt at church. They’d dress up to go to a wedding. Why not the house of the Lord?

Maybe we’re just too casual in everything. Maybe it’s not just church. Look at the average person you see anywhere–even the grocery store or mall. Very few people are dressed appropriately. I have a kid. I know it’s hard to get out the door looking decent at times. Sometimes it’s impossible. But this is a trend, not something you see every now and then. I think it goes back to the lack of modesty in general. While shorts may be appropriate at the gym, they’re not a good way to set an example of modesty at church.

At a church we attended a few years ago, there was a huge controversy over swimsuits in the service. Yes, swimsuits. The youth group was on their way to a water park that afternoon and many of the kids were wearing swimsuits (with shorts over them) in the morning service. I’m glad the youth were there. I’m glad they were in the service. But they shouldn’t have been wearing swimsuits. (And I’m not sure a mixed group of youth at a water park is such a good idea, either–call me crazy, but I’ve been a youth, too. Parents would be shocked if they knew what was going on on most youth trips.)

This can be a controversial issue. But I think we need to take a closer look at the message we’re actually sending by dressing down at church. It may not be the message we’re intending to send.

Published in: on April 13, 2008 at 8:22 pm  Comments (1)  

Modesty Monday

I’ve decided to make Mondays Modesty Day here on my blog. (If there’s already a Modesty Monday somewhere, sorry, I’m not stealing your idea, I just don’t have time to Google.) So today I thought I’d share some general sites on modesty. (And no, technically it’s not Monday yet. Deal with it.)

This is Wendy Shalit’s site for “Girls Gone Mild”, which I hope to be reviewing soon. It’s an excellent look at the “modesty movement” in our culture. Shalit also wrote “A Return to Modesty”, also a great read. This site is geared more towards older (high school) girls and college-age women.

Here, a post on whether modesty today is actually do-able. The blogger also has an interesting list of dress requirements from Bob Jones University. I’ve heard many times how strict Bob Jones is, but, like the blogger, I actually thought these were pretty reasonable.

That will have to do it for now. Hopefully, I’ll have more time next week to put together more resources!  The first words of each sentence is the link. For some reason, it doesn’t look clickable, but it is!

Published in: on April 6, 2008 at 10:22 pm  Comments (2)  

Modesty–A lost art

Unless you’ve been living in a cave, I’m sure you’ve noticed the lack of modesty today. I’m sick of this. I’m sick of seeing body parts that only one’s spouse used to see. I’m sick of the “hooker” clothes for little girls. I’m sick of moms trying to out-dress their teenagers. I do not want to see anyone’s navel ring, bra straps, underwear or lack of underwear.

As Christians, the Bible says we’re called to be different. It says women are to dress modestly. Note, it says modestly, not frumpy. We don’t have to look bad just because we’re modestly dressed. I’ll admit, it’s hard to find the right balance. I’m not sure I’ve found it yet.

In some cases, church is last place one finds modesty. This is truly sad. We were members of a church where status was very important and every Sunday was like a fashion competition. (One reason we’re no longer there…) I often saw more immodestly dressed women (and yes, it’s usually women) there than the mall. Even the little girls were too “adult” in their dress. After one particular Sunday, Curly Haired Husband remarked, “No one told me it was Cleavage Day.” 

So, for those of us who appreciate modesty, I’ll be blogging about the issue as it comes up and hopefully offering some helpful links. This one, by Mrs. Lauren Christine, is very well-written and expresses her convictions on modesty. (She also has a great site, by the way. Check it out.)

And for the record, I’m not “dresses only”, though some members of my family are. I think dresses/skirts are more feminine and ladylike, but I also think there are situations where modest pants are appropriate. I’m not talking low-rise jeans here, but there are situations that make dress-wearing very difficult. We need to look very carefully at what we’re revealing no matter what we’re wearing.

Published in: on April 3, 2008 at 8:17 pm  Comments (1)